It was a long time ago when I went out to see a play with my mom. Since she doesn’t have a daughter (She has three boys and used to say that she has four boys including my father!) and a boy usually doesn’t take a mom out in the Korean culture, it was a special moment for both of us.
I remember that we sat down in the dark play house and had an unusual experience, an experience of the Oedipus Complex-a son’s unique affection towards a mother. I felt my mom was beautiful.
Now I am home that has changed dramatically. Since my mom had a colon cancer surgery and is on chemo now, my father started housekeeping, cooking and caregiving. When I see my father preparing a dinner, I felt ashamed because I used to say that a Korean man doesn’t cook, rationalizing my habit of staying away from cooking. Here is my father who is a first son of the big and traditional family which means housekeeping is not supposed to be his because he takes care of all works outside home instead. My mom said to me that she thanks God for making my father cook and do housework because she feels comfortable if she dies and leaves him behind.
I took my mom and dad out yesterday to watch a movie. I realized it was such a long time ago that I did this to them. We walked around a department store and looked around shoes and clothes. We chatted and were amused to converse with clerks, asking prices that were expansive and showing ‘wow’ expressions. The movie was fascinating and my parents seemed enjoyed as well. Their comments after were critical and funny, I thought.
Every morning I wake up, thanking God that I am home. Feeling so good to know my mom and dad are next to me, waiting for me to wake up. A warm meal is there waiting for me as well. It is home that I am. It is home that my mom and dad are. It is home that a man finds a parental love, an incarnational love of God.